Captain’s Log #3: Tapping Pat for Fun and Profit

[This entry is from Robert and, due to the direction that the game went, deals with some of the more risque elements of Freeport (e.g., prostitution) and may not be suitable for younger audiences.]

When we last left our heroes they had just been surrounded in a narrow street by a number of thugs, the leader of which asked us to hand over Allara.

Naturally, they refused, and so the fight was on! Although most of the thugs were only wielding clubs, one on each end of the narrow street had an axe. The thugs moved in quickly and began to attack. Zahndethus quickly dispatched one of the axe users. It was then that the leader yelled out to “shoot the wizard and the weird one!”. There were crossbowmen on the roofs of the buildings on either side! Zahndethus became a human pincushion, and was down and out. Some fancy moves by Gills easily dispatch two more thugs, and he sees another crossbowman around the corner.

After healing Zahndethus, the crossbowmen on the roofs turn their attention to him. Meanwhile, Tory is at the other end of the street, holding off three thugs at once, including the other axe user. Now fully healed, Zahndethus remained prone, strangely becoming harder to hit, and fired fire bolts are both crossbowmen. Gary the crossbowman met his fiery demise, much to the chagrin of this brother on the other roof.

By now, only one thug on the ground remained standing. Tory suggested that he run, and so he did. Our heroes looted one of the axes for later, and then were suddenly accosted by a flying demon. It took a swipe at Allara, hurting her badly and knocking her out. The foul beast was quickly slain after that. Pta did what he could for Allara, but she remained unconscious.

The journey continued into a better, more working class part of town. A kid approached our heroes, offering to guide them where they needed to go, but ran off with the money. Turns out he was really a hobbit or something. Another kid approached, also offering to guide us. He took off a shoe, revealing a non-hairy foot, proving that he was a real kid. The kid guided the party to the gate to Old Town. The guard there, however, refused to let our heroes though, instead directing them to a place nearby where rickshaws could be hired.

Although there were three rickshaws, only two runners were available, according to the female dwarf who ran the business. So the party crammed into two, and were taken to Shelfer manor. Oddly, the stone mansion looked rather run down compared to the neighboring manor houses. As our heroes approached the door, it was opened by a young man named Emerich, one of Allara’s brothers. He invited the group in, and directed Gills to lay Allara on a bench.

Inside, the manor looked unkempt as well. Emerich revealed that he was not expecting Allara. Tory was suspicious of him, and did not trust him from the start. Shortly, Allara’s mother shows up, and reveals that it was she who sent Allara’s escort. Emerich had a quickly supressed burst of anger at his mother, but Tory noticed it. The mother directs Emerich to find the party an inn for the night, and to give them a reward for brining Allara safely as well. Again, he looks angry. He fetches a maid and takes her off to give her orders. He is heard treating her very harshly.

A skinny woman, Amanda, comes down the stairs, and when she sees Allara and our heroes, she screams and flees back up the stairs. Our heroes also notice Jack, another brother, peeking around the corner at his mother. He gasps when seen and runs off. The maid returns with the kid who guided our heroes before, with directions to take the party to the Crab Shack. They quickly come to the decision that being in the inn that Emerich expects them to be in is probably a bad idea, and get the kid to take them somewhere else instead.

The party arrives at an inn called The Bucket Brigade, where the drinks and stew both come in buckets. They receive the eatin’, drinkin’, and, after some convincing of Gills, the whorin’ discounts. Gills bravely took one for the team, and did nasty nasty things with the innkeeper’s less than pleasant to look at daughter, Pat. A phrase is tossed around: Once you tap Pat, you know where it’s at!

Later, a very tall and well armed woman approaches Gills. She asks Gills several questions, mentioning that she knew he was at the Shelfer’s last night. Gills is a bit intimidated and spills it all. The woman tells Gill’s that our heroes now have breakfast plans. The next morning, few conscious people are in the common room of the inn. There is the woman from before, introduced as Louvette, a priestly looking guy, Lidan, and a soldier looking guy, Handell.

Lidan reveals that it was the mother that wishes harm on Allara. Lidan says that for many years, he worked as a tutor for the Shelfer’s seven children. On each child’s 18th birthday, something happened to them, and they were changed. Emerich became much more cruel, and to see Lianna would horrify someone. Lidan believed the mother was doing some sort of black magic ritual on the children. He found tomes of an unseemly sort in the house. He was later dismissed under armed guard. He wants help getting Allara back out of the house, before the same can happen to her, that very night!

Our heroes were skeptical, and decided to check on his credentials at the Temple of Knowledge before agreeing to help.

The directions were hard to follow – many turns, and don’t forget to go around the well THREE times – but the party eventually arrived at the Temple of Knowledge, where they requested a handwriting sample of Lidan’s. While waiting for that to be prepared, they got help from a disciple of Michelin, the God of Which Road to Choose, who guided them to a place where they could sell the axe they looted earlier. They were able to sell it for 5 Lords, but it would have been more if Gills had been willing to hurt himself with it.

After then retrieving the handwriting sample from the Temple of Knowledge, our heroes found an apothecary for Gills, which had a special treatment for those unfortunate souls who have tapped Pat. It was a very unpleasant procedure involving much hot wax.

Afterward, the party met with Lidan again, and matched his handwriting with that of the sample, and so agreed to help him. They received from him a layout of the manor, as well as anti-poison vials, in case our meals are poisoned.

That evening, they arrive at the party. At the dinner table are Weiland, Emerich, Amanda, Jack, the mother, Liana – a hideous pig like blob of a woman holding a cleaver and a live chicken, and another daugter.

[This whole night, following the initial fight (and even part of that fight) was off the cuff stuff. Somehow it, um, degenerated into less than polite topics…hey, it is Freeport after all. It seems that most of the patrons of the Bucket Brigade have, themselves, partaken in the “whorin’ discount” offered by the proprietor and had placed numerous bets on Gills’ session with the rather infamous Pat. Fortunately, Robert spared us the details of Gills’ need to visit an “apothecary” following his brief engagement with the less than comely legend (think the “It’s Pat” character from SNL) and how a certain parasitical infestation upon Gills’ nether regions was dealt with.

I’ll just say that my amusement over the technique I came up with and described caused some cringing amongst the male members of the group and may have some concerned just how true my sadistic tendencies might be. 😈

P.S., Outside of gaming, said tendencies don’t run deep at all. In game though, I’ll let ’em run wild!]

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